“If you think that all school proms are pretty much alike, read on. There was something different, something special about this one. There were decorations, sure; there was music and there were refreshments for later on. But this was an exceptional prom, for some exceptional young people – an '”Extreme Prom,” its organizers called it, and they weren’t far from the truth.
The dancegoers at this Extreme Prom were all teens and young adults. They come from different towns in northern New Jersey but they’re united by one thing: they live every day with autism, with Down syndrome, with all kinds of developmental disabilities. And for one moment, at least, they shared an experience common to kids all over the country--their own prom. It was unforgettable, and that’s just the way its organizers planned it.
“Most kids get to play football, get jobs, have friends, go to the mall--things that our kids never get to do,” Deborah Wertalik of North Arlington told Christopher Maag, who reported her comments in a story he wrote for The Record, a newspaper that serves the area. “We got tired of it. Our kids are great, and we want them to experience those things, too.”
Wertalik has been busy organizing things like the Extreme Prom for almost a decade, ever since she watched her daughter caring for a son with autism. First came Putting the Pieces Together, a support group for parents. Then she started Special Angels Recreation, which organizes sporting events--baseball, basketball, football, a cheering squad--and weekend movie trips for young people with disabilities.
“I never had a plan to do all this,” Wertalik said to Maag. “People suggested a football team, so we made a football team. Then somebody suggested a prom, so we tried that.”
Judging from the success of the Extreme Prom, held at a Carlstadt restaurant, the group had an instant winner. You can take that on the word of the professional hairstylist who was there for the occasion.
“It’s an honor to be here,” said Guy Anthony of Clifton. “This is a bit challenging, because you have to work fast, and you have to work with what you’ve got. But they are all beautiful girls.”
The promgoers themselves couldn't have been more enthusiastic. Kelsey Griffin of Ringwood, vibrant in a turquoise gown, kept repeating, “This is exciting!” The young woman, 21 years old, has autism.
From their recreation center the dancers had traveled by bus to the restaurant, where in a special party room they walked under an archway made of turquoise and white balloons. They got used to the waiting photographers, and before long they were all dancing to the recorded music of U2 and other rock groups.
Maag reported that Jackson Fritch of Montclair, a 13-year-old who has autism, leaned over his mother’s shoulder and together they swayed, side by side.
“This is the only chance he’s had to do anything like this,” said his mother, Stephanie Fritch. “It’s a big deal for him. It’s a big deal for me. I never thought he’d get to experience this.”
(This essay is a recent “Light One Candle” column, written by Jerry Costello, of The Christophers; it is one of a series of weekly columns that deal with a variety of topics and current events.)
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